Post Partum Depression Magnified With Multiple Births

May is Mental Health Awareness Month

 

     I would like to bring awareness to Post Partum Depression.  Its real, it should be addressed as soon as the diagnosis for a pregnancy is made.  Primary care doctors should truly educate patients on the signs and symptoms, because they often can just be swept away as normal sufferings of every parent. 

 

    Post partum depression is a condition that manifests itself in women following the birth of a child. The most notable symptoms experienced by sufferers of post partum depression include sleeping disturbances, really, as if a crying infant, or two or three is not enough to wake you up, recurrent sadness, ok, here is another one, yeah, my freedom is gone, my friends don't care to help, my family has their lives to carry on with, loss of appetite, oh, sure, because I am breast feeding and pumping every drop, and feel like a two-legged cow, and I have so much time in between twins, or triplets to eat, much less to prepare a meal, loss of energy, do I have to mention this one...hopelessness, I hope my husband will come home from working his 9-5 job and help me, frustration, yeah, because I can't accomplish shit, exhaustion, yeah, cause 1 baby will make you tired, but Multiples will cause sheer and utter depletion of any bit of energy you have, guilt, I cant take care of my husband, myself, any other people in the house, low self esteem, because lets face it, you are still in that jogging suit 3 days later, social withdrawal, could have something to do from the fact that you have not showered, or put on deodorant, and many other negative experiences. The key symptom contributing to the classification of this type of depression is feeling lack of affection for the new born baby.

 

    I think there are several therapies to treating this, and even if you feel alone, help is available for postpartum depression include psychotherapy, cognitive behavioral therapy and medication, and some women find that a combination works best.

Some ideas I have are getting on a schedule, keep the babies on a schedule, as best you can.  The NICU often helps initiate this, stick with it. 

Force yourself to make time for you, yes, the babies will cry, as long as you know they are fed and changed, a 5 minute shower, a song on your iPod, a phone call with a friend, anything to break up the day. Put some deodorant on, shave your legs, lip gloss, maybe? If you look good, you feel good.

----ASK for help! Don't let this get the best of you! Let friends or family know you don't have anything else to give and you need help! If you feel like you are being swallowed up by PPD, talk to your doctor, church, family, moms of multiples group in your area. 

 

Let the small stuff go, live in the moment with the babies.  Take lots of photos! It will pass you by so quickly.   

 

 

 

 

Mom Goggles!! Our secret is out, now!

Happy Mother's Day!

God gave mommies everywhere special gifts. Here is one of them! Built-in Mom goggles! Sometimes we wonder how moms do it. From dirty diapers, to cheering on the next Rembrandt…they seem to just see things differently. Our moms see us differently. Watch as two dads get a glimpse at the way moms view the world…and then realize that it goes way beyond what they see.

Backpack Harnesses - Child Leashes

Want to read some parent bashing, from you guessed it other parents?


From a mom of multiple multiples, don't tell me that putting a harness on my kids is a cringeworthy practice that comes close to treating them like 4-legged creatures!

How dare you, what happens when they get hurt?

Child leashes - Are they helpful or humiliating?

A. Pawlowski TODAY contributor

March 31, 2014 at 8:15 AM ET

Staying connected with the kids takes on a literal meaning for many parents who turn to child safety harnesses to keep their little ones close.
Attached to mom or dad by a tether, a small child can’t bolt off or get lost in a mall, at an amusement park or any other crowded place. Depending on your viewpoint, it’s one of the best ways to keep kids out of harm’s way or a cringeworthy practice that comes uncomfortably close to treating them like four-legged creatures on a leash.

Courtesy Katy Maher

Katy Maher uses harnesses to keep her kids close when they go explore their Chicago neighborhood.

Put Katy Maher firmly in the "pro-harness" column. The mom of 14-month-old twins lives on a very busy street in Chicago, so she recently started using harnesses when she’s on her own and the family wants to venture outside. The knowledge that the kids can’t stray far away from her provides peace of mind, she said.
“I really love being able to just go outside and walk around and let them explore. So this gives us the freedom to do that and not be as stressful,” Maher, 40, told TODAY Moms.
“If it’s just you and the two little ones, it can be kind of a scary prospect when you’re out on a busy street.”
The harnesses look like tethers attached to backpacks in the shape of stuffed animals that Maher’s twins, a boy and a girl, like to play with when they’re at home. Mom lets them lead the way when they’re walking outside for a hands-free experience, but they also hold hands when they want to.
Maher recently put together a list of all the reasons why she uses a harness in a column that also acknowledged some passers-by are openly critical of her stance.
“There have been a couple of people who looked sideways at me, and I have heard the comment, ‘I leash my dog, you leash your kids,’” Maher recalled.
“I didn’t want to get very upset but I was, and I said, ‘I’m doing my best to keep them safe.’”

Kat Komin’s mom always used a harness with her when she was little, so Komin did the same when her 2-year-old daughter began scooting off from her at the playground.
“It got me really scared that you just blink and the next second your daughter is running away,” said Komin, 32, who lives in suburban Seattle and wrote about the experience in her blog.
She was also shaken after reading a news story about a stranger snatching a boy away from his parents during an outing, so Komin uses the harness when the family is out in a public place as an extra measure of security for her daughter.

Courtesy Kat Komin

Kat Komin says using a child safety harness on her daughter provides an extra layer of safety when they're in a very public place.

Like Maher, she also gets looks from people who disapprove.
“I just glare right back at them,” Komin said. “Having her on a harness definitely outweighs the looks for me because I’m just interested in my child’s safety and I’m doing the best that I can.”
Parenting experts have mixed opinions about child safety harnesses.
Some children who are incredibly impulsive or have special needs can put themselves in dangerous situations, so using a harness could be a good thing, said Jennifer Hartstein, a New York child psychologist.
“Some parents really do not know what to do, so this is a potentially effective solution,” Hartstein said.
But she cautioned the practice could create embarrassment in children that they could carry with them over time. Indeed, many people can’t get past the visual—there’s even a photo sharing site for those “who laugh when they see children on leashes.”
For the general population of kids, a firm stance as a parent should be enough to keep a child from scooting off, said Susan Newman, a New York social psychologist and parenting expert who is a critic of the harnesses.
“To me, it’s like treating a child like a dog or an animal when in fact as a parent your job is to make the rules,” Newman said.
“The perception is, this is a parent who can’t control her toddler.”

 A controversial topic has gone viral after a mother wrote a blog about using childhood harnesses while out with her 14-month-old twins.
Parents won’t be able to rope in children as they get older, so it’s important to set boundaries at an early age and have consequences if kids don’t listen, Newman said.
If you do decide to use a harness, it’s never acceptable to tug on the tether or drag the child, Hartstein said. As for dealing with sideways glances, she wishes people were more sympathetic.
“Parents are often judging one another rather than supporting one another. It would be so great if parents could use the situation as a discussion point rather than a divisive one,” Hartstein said.

 

Strollers for Twins & Triplets - We have tried 'em all!

You live and learn, hopefully you don't have to buy so many strollers!

 

Started out in folding umbrella strollers.  Found they provide zero support, they don't recline, horrible for the kids, and only good if you have 3 adults to push the babies.

 

 

 Moved to the Inglesina Trio Triplet Carriage

Each seat can be turned forward, to see the world, Can be turned to face mommy when pushing, or as shown to see each other.

Up side to this stroller is that no one can pull each others hair! But it's not the easiest to adjust and not much storage space underneath.

 

So we bought this one.  The babytrend.. Love the sunshades.  Keeps nosey people at bay, somewhat. Lots of storage underneath.  They all recline.  Middle baby has minimal space. Folded, it fits nicely in the van.  But then we had the hair pulling...

Then the twins came along, so we bought the Double snap n go frame and used them with our graco car seats.  This works awesome! Love it! Hell, when you go from a massive triple stroller to only 2, its a breeze.

It was then that we also moved to our Step2 Choo Choo wagon!

 The seats can also be rotated any direction!

 

 Quickly learned that you need shade in the wagons! So we bought the Radio Flyer Umbrellas.  They are adjustable, they clamp on to anything!  When the boys outgrew the infant car seats, we upgraded their stroller to the Combi Double Sport Side By Side.  This is also an awesome stroller.  It folds up nicely, has a strap like a golf club bag to throw over your shoulder, super light.  Reclines all the way down. The sun shades have a see thru window.  Tons of storage, cup holders (even one for mommy), snack holders, and a compartment for mom's keys.  

 Here we are at SeaWorld, with my sis who also has twins.  She is using the Babytrend Sit and Stand Double stroller.  (Both can sit if they choose)

And when you don't feel like a stroller, throw your hands in the air and buy a barrel wagon!

 

Feeding Toddler Triplets and Twins

We had a triplet feeding table, I found on craigslist! Best thing ever for consolidating your multiples to one area.  You can put down placemats, plates, or have them eat directly off the table.  We had a plastic mat under the table, purchased from Office Depot, for desk chairs.  Makes for very easy clean-up afterward. 

Also recommend the Fisher Price Space Saver High chair/booster seats.  They recline, and the plastic cushioned liners remove very easily for clean-up. So when your triplets start being able to climb out of the feeding table, buy these.

With the twins, heck, all that went out the window, they just ate off the floor.  Yes, at times, the floor mat came in quite handy with them!

How to Feed Infant Triplets & Twins when you are not an octopus

   Pretty early on, you learn well, quite frankly, that you have to feed your kids. It's not one of the easiest things to do, especially when they want to eat at the same time, and it's preferred that you feed them all at the same time, unless you just want to be a Zombie or a Robot. After all, new Moms of Multiples need your rest to function!

Some of the systems I found that work well include the Podee Bottles & the Milkmaid Foam Bottle Props.  I have included additional pics of other hands-free feeding systems that have high praise on other websites, as well.

Squirrels are nasty rodents!

So, this just happened. A rodent (otherwise known as a squirrel) was on my fence. i started walking toward it yelling get out of my yard, and he hopped over the fence poked his head back at me and I kept running snapping pics and he hid on the other side!

 I screamed, HEYYY, get off my fence! Get the fuck out of my yard!
Heyy you, I see you!! Go away! he just sat there and stared until I got closer. Then popped up and his butt flew in the air, he was on the other side, and his tail was sticking up and I was walking and snapping pics and he popped his head up, like Bitch, you still coming over here, oh shit! he took off on their side of the fence.  Nasty fucker.

Thats him on the other side of the fence.  I am sure he will be back again to torment me.